dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

Danny: Herald Of The Housening.

One of the things one must remember about Elly is her tendency to make a pleasant myth of painful experiences in order to avoid learning from the past. While it might look as if Michael is the only Patterson who was about to transmute the ridiculous and needless clusterfuck that was spending Christmas at a failing family farm in the coldest spot on the continent into a Hallmark Movie Of The Week, we have proof that somewhere in the next two and a half years from now, they'll come to the conclusion that what Mike needs to cure him of "defiance" (by which John means not agreeing with every stupid thing that comes out of his ignorant fucking yap quickly or cravenly enough) and "dangerous attachments" (by which Elly means associating with a girl she doesn't know) is to send him to the Magic Land of Wonder and Enrichment that is a dirt farm because absence has made the depressing stain on the map more delightful the longer they're away from it.

The reason that I mention this is that by the year 2007, it is quite likely that all of the Pattersons who bore witness to the horrid and preventable mess that blighted the Christmas of 1988 have let a fine haze of pea-brained nostalgia blur the past to a more pleasing and less teeth-grindingly stupid shape. Instead of remembering being cheek by jowl with dumbass hicks, they choose to remember the place as a sort of Xanadu filled with love and companionship. This is why, I should think, it made sense to everyone who wasn't April to just crowd into the Pattermanse like idiots and stay until Mike forced Elly to flee her home by waving his brats under her nose. This means that like a lot of stupid things, the Housening is really Danny's fault. If he were a better host, the Pattersons would remember a boring but pleasant time and be less inclined to recreate it.
Tags: exile farm, the housening, uncle thanos

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