- It must have a hidey-hole so he can isolate himself from his family while he communes with the muses.
- It must be owned by a meddling old nutjob who's pretty much a PSA for timely euthanasia.
- It must be the exact opposite of what's good for his wife and children.
Secondly (and this is the more important thing), he's as shit at financial decisions as Mike is. We see Mike piss his pile away bribing parking lot attendants and being the most anal prick at Starbucks EVAH!! and wonder if it's genetic. When we see Phil be perfectly prepared to walk away from a great deal his wife wants because of two lousy mortgage payments on a house that ended up getting bulldozed so someone could put up Milboring's iteration of Uncle Sam's Retail Monster Box, we end up confirming this hunch. Having him make Georgia miserable by not 'wasting money' on a moving van because he doesn't know what free means is just idiocy icing on his bullshit cake.