dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

The acne hypothesis.

One of the more irritating parts of the stupid, stupid hormone attack arc is that Gordon wants very much to break out in zits like normal people instead of having an epileptic seizure every time he gets an erection because his nitwit creator is too damned shy to ask people what one feels like and also thinks that since she has the best brain, her belief that it must be like perimenstrual cramping has to be right.

This is because Patterson acne always proceeds in much the same way. First off, the person has to have a zit show up in the most visible place ever at the worst possible time. This leads to the sufferer panicking like an idiot and making things worse for him or herself by scrubbing his or her face as if he or she were buffing a floor. When this happens, we have an inept attempt to disguise the condition followed by mockery by the clear-skinned which leads to the emotional pay-off: Elly standing around like a shivering pillar of shit mouthing platitudes while a distraught child reverts to infancy wailing about the unfairness of it all.

The fact that every single teenager has had this happen makes me think that Lynn was strip-mining her own adolescence. This is why we had them all go mad with overwrought grief because they wanted clear skin NOW!!!! and why they all wanted to visit mayhem on the clear-skinned who lorded their perfection over the eternal victim of all victims surpassing all others and so on into the hot water.
Tags: amazonian catfish tinfoil hat

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