March 2nd, 2007

Calm Candiru

I gotta dollar, I gotta spend it or the Mike Patterson plan for financial success

When you remember that Mikey is simply the same irritatingly callous, sullen, pig-ignorant and selfish argument for birth control he was when this mess started, it should come as no real shock that the world of money, which is to say one of the REALEST of all real worlds, is a mystery even more baffling than that of the female world. You can explain financial concepts that would be received wisdom to idiot third-graders and the nose-picking, pit-sniffing twerp would make a hash outta them. This is, of course, a result of John and Elly's disgusting failure as parents; they failed to let him fail. John was (and is) far too distant emotionally to do his son any good by teaching him the ways of the world and Elly far too sentimental and waffling to make him deal with the consequences of his mistakes. Whenever Bonehead ran short of moolah after wisely investing it in shiny trash instead of wasting it on necessities, the 'rents could be counted on to bail the muttonhead out. SUPER IDEA, JERKS!! You did the world a solid, plopping this nincompoop onto the landscape. The end result is a hopeless ding-dong who's gonna spend the rest of his worthless life racing around looking for some sap to mooch off of 'cause all he knows to do with money is to spend it. The sad thing is that Deanna might just get an ego-boost playing Mom to this fucking wad of shit that's witlessly burning through her savings; that could be the only reason he's still married.