March 18th, 2007

Snarky Candiru2

Exile Farm: John and Elly's nuclear option.

I know I've mentioned it before, but it should come as no surprise that a passive-aggressive control freak like Elly has one great big dread; her offspring becoming TRULY independent. After all, the way she justifies her reign of petty tyranny and emotional blackmail is that her children 'need' her. If they were truly autonomous individuals who were fully capable as defining themselves AS themselves and not as Elly's kids, she'd have no other purpose in life than to vacuum the Pattermanse and fret about her perverted husband's train fixation. The great big danger to her self-esteem is the fact that the kids grow to close to someone she doesn't approve of. After all, her children must be 'protected' not only from these 'bad influences' and their heretical notion that the sun does not shine forth from Elly's fat arse, but from themselves. How best to gently remind them of their place in the world? Pack them off to her in-law's farm in Manitoba. This wondrous act of charity, which must NEVER be confused with arbitrary and stupid punishment for trying to think for themselves, has the glorious benefit of destroying the helpless child's bond with the outside 'aggressor'. Who cares if other people think she's holding the threat of being cut off from their social circle over her kids like the sword of Damocles? So what if they say the end result is a group of social maladroits who'll need Mommy to kiss boo-boos, yea verily, until they're SIXTY? She's only trying to help (herself)!