January 18th, 2010

Snarky Candiru2

Start School Failure the Patterson way

The arc that I expect will mark the transition point between the new-ruins and the era of straight reprints will be the Parent-Teacher conference that John and Elly attend at the end of this March. What we'll see is an explanation of what Miss Campbell means when she calls Michael a non-linear thinker; in the original version of events, we see that Mike doesn't do what's asked of him because he has trouble listening to what Teacher is saying; what's more, his poor social skills and excitable nature always seem to keep him from being anything more than slightly-below-average. What's more, he seems to have the same lousy work ethic Elly has; he'll waste his time on frivolities such as tormenting his sister, whining about how it's unfair that his mother wants to get out of the house before she goes looney and bitching about how awful it is to live a life that billions would envy but when discipline and hard work are called for, he snarls and gives into defeatism and outrage. It would be bad enough if he were the only indifferent student in the Pattermanse; too bad that Liz was also a poor fit for public education. The difference, of course, was the mental defect that hampered her; instead of Mike's hunger for attention that led him down the ruinous path of class-clownism, her timid and essentially negative nature made her school years a form of torture for herself and the rest of the Pattersons. It's going to be a painful few years watching her walking in Elly's glum footsteps as she stomps down the hallway with a despairing frown soldered onto what would otherwise be an appealing face and bellowing that she has no friends.