May 17th, 2011

Snarky Candiru2

From Ted to the Settlepocalypse: a proposal.

It seems that my earlier post in which John was trying to punish Ted for not living up to a supposed promise to Connie is a load of flapdoodle; that's because howtheduck reminded me that John's actions were designed to get Ted to move forward and sweep Connie off her feet. I've already pointed out that John is fixated on what Connie does because she reminds him of the kid sister that he uses as a benchmark for sexual desirability; what I failed to remind you is that he sees Ted as a version of himself. This allows him to combine the advantages of having a fellow medical practitioner to swap horror stories about insane wives with, driving Elly nuts and depriving himself of the dangerous precedent of having a happy bachelor racing around threatening the world of monogamous misery in he lives, he has the hidden advantage of having a legal version of the brother-sister union that the psych textbooks he doesn't like to read because they remind him that he's a sicko tell him that he wants. The problem with that is that, well, he can't control Ted or Connie as well as he'd like; he also doesn't seem to notice that Connie is the more destructive of the two. We can pretty much classify her as a female foreshadowing of Anthony; she has this idiot Ted dangling on her hook and, despite flushing him so she can marry someone even more passive and wretched, finds the fact that he's still fixated on her to an extent an annoyance. The interesting thing is that this is much the same reason that Elly is still mildly upset that Phil didn't marry Connie either; she too wanted an extension of herself to marry her brother. Since neither person got what they wanted, they decided to arrange things so that extensions of themselves could marry extensions of themselves. The result is, of course, a teal-and-lavender abomination in which Anthony (a combination of the worst elements of John and Elly's personalities) married Liz and thus guaranteed the incest-by-proxy their barely-hidden lechery craves.