July 20th, 2011

Snarky Candiru2

The Retcon Factor and its effects on the romantic plot tumor...

As you know, I've got a bit of the problem with the way the new-runs have messed up the chronology. It's sort of creepy, for instance, to have to realize that Lynn really does want the relationship between Mike and Deanna to have started in kindergarten of all places. You know and I know that that is somewhat on the sickening side but you can't tell her that.

That being said, the warped chronology does make all the whining that Phil is doing about Connie tossing him aside because Ted said jump make a damned sight more sense. In the original understanding of events, he'd tried to parlay a one-night stand into a romance because Connie, who he barely know, was a fairly proficient sexual athlete. When Connie turned around and went back to Ted, he didn't act like a regular dumb guy from the sticks and shrug off self-defeating behavior like he should have; what he did instead was act like a spoiled brat (Mike, for instance) and declare that she should die old and alone because she was interested in someone else.

In the new version of history, his antics look a lot more comprehensible; that's because the two of them had what he thought was a fairly solid long distance relationship that, for reasons that escaped him, went zippity-doo-dah when the distance was reduced to down the block. Outraged that familiarity led to ennui at best and contempt at worst, Phil's hostile over-reaction to Connie's equivocation makes a lot more sense. Granted, it's the sense that stopped clocks make but we have to hand Lynn this one; she sure didn't intend to but her stupid revisionist history made Phil less of an ass.