July 27th, 2011

Indignant Candiru

Stupidity never takes a vacation.....

Remember last year when I was talking about how the Pattersons never seem to know what they're doing when it comes to planning a vacation? Well, it's time once again to go into detail about how Elly's stupidity ruins things for everyone this time. Bear with me as I remind us of the shape of failures to comes.

First off, we have to deal with a parallel to John's idiocy of last year. As you will recall, he took Ted's self-deprecating description of his bachelor pad at face value because a literal-minded dolt like him wouldn't understand the need to underplay the good things in his life Ted has; this led him to the idiotic conclusion that an abandoned shanty was Ted's cottage. Upon discovery that he'd led them the wrong way, Elly, who also thought that they were in the right place, spent weeks not talking to John and getting angry at the children for reminding her that she's a gullible simpletonmaking a fool of her. What happened this time is that Elly was in such a rush to get the cheapest accommodations possible, she wound up getting roomettes instead of rooms; John's disbelief was a lot more immediate.

That's because they'd ended up having to share their beds with the children, John with Lizzie and Mike with Elly; instead of making the best of things, the Pattersons whined piteously about how haaaaard it was to have to deal with their children. Speaking of their refusal to deal with their children, their stupid inability to supervise them adequately led to their being embarrassed by preventable nonsense.

This, of course, leads us to the most annoying part of traveling with the children: the destination. Instead of taking them somewhere fun, they were going to see relatives and get yelled at for being bored by stories about times from before they were born. The end result is that the Pattersons come to the conclusion that children and vacations don't mix because they're too stupid to cope with them.