April 4th, 2016

Snarky Candiru2

Don't do us any favours, Train Man

To continue merrily on with my theory that understanding John makes him a better foi is that the irritating thing about his less appealing acts is that when he does them, he actually seems to believe that he's doing the victim of his aggression a great big favour. The template for this is his steadfast refusal to consider letting Elly work out of the home. While he couldn't help being a lot self-serving, he honestly thought that he was being this great guy protecting his poor wife from the cruel, cruel labour force and providing her a safe, happy alcove that would take no time to clean and so on and so forth. His need to think that he was married to a very different woman and his belief that hormones were what made her see the place as a jail were what kept him from admitting why she wanted to shove his generosity up his ass. To do that would be admitting that no, Elly isn't crazy and wrong to not want a damned socket set for Christmas just because HE thinks it would be a great gift.

This need of his to think that giving someone else a gift he would like is the height of generosity also seems to be why it is that he sent his kids to Exile Farm. While Elly was trying to step on relationships, John seems to have wanted to be a farmhand by proxy by sending his kids to a swell farm filled with sensible people who knew what was up and so on and so forth. Hell, he even made April move to the Tiny Train House because he thought it would be great for her to live in the smaller space he liked because it would save Elly some time cleaning. Hmm. I wonder if John has ever heard of Parkinson's Law. Probably not because if we were to see them right now, he'd be baffled that despite downsizing, Elly still spends most of her time busily cleaning because he doesn't realize that she'd spent most of her day doing chores if they lived in a linen closet.
Snarky Candiru2

On hierachical thinking and how it makes life worse: the 2016 edition.

It's not bad enough that John is the sort of dope who assumes that he's being this big generous guy when he gives people things they don't want or need only to turn around and mope about the cruelty of, say, Elly not thinking that a set of torque wrenches is a wonderful gift without the annoying tendency to put everything and everyone in a place that they don't really want to go. We're a short while away from his being outraged that Elly is controlling where they dance because she's not supposed to do that. Given his paranoia, he obviously confuses her being a tangle-footed clodhopper who doesn't know what she's doing with her trying to dictate to him or some crap. This leaves us with an annoying problem: a man who claims to see the simple answers to life's problems totally ignoring said easy answers owing to his need to keep the totem pole in its 'correct' order.

Not only does this make him a shitty husband who subjected his wife to years of torment and self-loathing because he wouldn't see that she saw her 'cozy, happy nest' as a gulag, it made him a shitty dad who could never wrap his head around the idea of children not plotting to destroy him. The best example is him going full-bore loonie because he thought (and probably still thinks) that Mike's story about missing an exit because he wasn't paying attention was a self-serving lie meant to defend him against rightful punishment for trying to usher in an era of chaos. The reason for this sort of stupidity has never really been explained because of the need to present him as a baffling freak who just barges in and starts complaining about his car and his home. The most plausible one is that someone (okay, two someones) did to him what he's doing to Mike: filling his head with the idea that he should dominate the proceedings and that wives and children obey daddies because Nature somehow made things that way. While most of us these days behold John and think of him as the sort of nitwit who might actually believe that Life is a Disney nature film that turns an unemployed wild animal into a Goldwater supporter, he's actually akin to Cliff Clavin. Like Cliff, John thinks that he's the wingnut that holds his family together. In reality,...he's just a wingnut.