May 9th, 2018

Snarky Candiru2

DSTO: the real cause of Farley's death.

As I type this, I do so in the knowledge that we are six years away from Elly making that stupid comment about April somehow toppling in the water as if it were something that simply happened and no one is at fault for it. While this is used as an excuse for Elly to be baffled by April's angry reaction to being immersed in water and John's mildly disgusted reaction to her panicking and begging not to be abandoned the next time they go on one of those stupid kid-hostile vacations, I'd like to point out that it reminds us of one thing we must remember: Farley's death due to stress is simply a symptom of a chronic ailment that made his life worse.

The name of said malady is something veterinarians use to describe a certain class of pet owner: "DSTO". This is, of course, short for Dog Smarter Than Owner and is used to describe the end result of a pet getting hurt or sick because his or her owner has chronic cranial rectosis. Other symptoms include them shaking their heads and whining that no matter how much they lecture him about the need to stay on the property, he goes wandering off as if he didn't listen so it's not their fault as well as sending out memos to neighbours about putting out better garbage because she's too dumb to know when a man is yanking her chain.