October 16th, 2020

Snarky Candiru2

Meet The Last Men

I should imagine that Elly's ideas of her last days on Earth rotate around her being surrounded by loved ones as they watch the sad miracle of her passing despite the fact that she knew damned well that said vision did not come true for either of her parents. What she doesn't want to admit is that she already knows the people who'll actually take centre stage when she goes the way of all flesh but they don't register with her. She saw the first of the last men and women the night she got a long-dreaded phone call about ten years ago when she started bleating about being a poor little orphan girl now that her daddy joined the choir invisible. That's because her pea-brained sentimentality blinded her to the nurses and orderlies who are going to be the people who will actually be the ones to mark her passing. She also let her need for sympathy blur the features of the people at the funeral home. I'm not sure if I should write John off as pre-deceasing her (even though I assume that will be the case) but the equal need to blank out her surroundings (and also probably curse his name for wanting to run off to chase after a comelier specter) will continue to make of the people who'll actually be the ones there when she goes a mystery.

The reason I'm convinced of this is that her passing when everyone else's attention is diverted will cause a shallow thinker to wonder why he didn't do more for his mother when she was alive.
Snarky Candiru2

Meet The Legacy Character

Now, you might have noticed that I invoked one of Elly's stupider comments in my last article. I did so on purpose because Thelma Baird might have been an incidental character but she had a huge impact because she judged Elly and found her wanting as a parent. Like most people, what she saw when she looked at Elly was not a misunderstood martyr but an obnoxious dolt who refused reasonable requests because she got it into her head that being a mother meant saying no to everything. This is pretty much why it was damned easy for her to hoodwink the moron into getting a dog she didn't want by telling her a bullshit story about how Elly was the only thing keeping a dog people would pay good money for from being put down.

She also seemed to think that the Patterson children needed a friendly face in their lives so as to reassure them that not all adults were akin to the oozing pustule on the buttocks of humanity they call a mother and were capable of forgiveness, tolerance and kindness. The irritating thing about her is having to remember the effect she had on Elly herself. Not only did her passing allow a dull mind to pass triteness off as depth, I'm convinced that her go-to argument for not fixing the gate because she doesn't want to look unfriendly stems from her not remembering that Mrs Baird had been dead for years by the time April started showing more initiative than her idiot older siblings.