dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

Catalog-Fu Two: Electric Boogaloo

If Lynn goes to straight reprints to fill out the week, we can probably expect to see the following unpalatable blasts from a best-forgotten past:

Potential strip for 20 January 2010:

Panel 1: As he and Lawrence put on their coats, Mike yells "I missed recess and I had to write lines and I'm never coming back to school! NEVER!!"

Panel 2: He then yells "I got kicked out of the library and I hate my teacher and it's all HER fault!!" Lawrence asks why.

Panel 3: Mike turns into what looks like the love child of B.D. from Doonesbury as he growls that she caught him mashing spitballs in the dictionary.

Summary: Ordinarily, I wouldn't pay the blindest bit of attention to a tantrum like this; the idea that the teacher is a bad person for punishing Mike for misbehavior instead of letting him get away with it because the world is supposed to revolve around him is, sadly, something a six-year old would think. The problem I have is that the Mike that was about to deliver a long, boring and probably insulting speech at Liz's wedding never grew out of thinking like this. Like Elly before him, he thinks that everything is someone else's fault.

Potential Strip for 21 January 2010

Panel 1: As Mike fishes through his jacket pocket, Lawrence asks "Whatcha got, Michael?"

Panel 2: Mike reminds us that this is really 1981 by telling Lawrence that he collected bottles for a Mr Perpeluk an' was given a whole dollar.

Panel 3: Now he doesn't know whether he should spend it now or save it for later.

Panel 4: Lawrence takes him aside and tells him "Let's go to the candy store an' I'll help you decide."

Summary: What we have here is another reminder that Mike is a natural-born follower; instead of going through all the hard work of thinking for himself, he's content to let other people make up his mind for him. Good thing we're about to see why.

Potential Strip for 22 January 2010

Panel 1: We're at the counter of the candy store and Mike, who has a perplexed look on his face, tells the cashier "I want two Whoopee bars.....No, make that one Whoopee bar and a box of Num-nuts."

Panel 2: Mike, who is still paralyzed with confusion, says "And gum? Yeah!  Gum an' some chips an' 10 licorice whips! No! Nine an' a Koo-koo ball!"

Panel 3: The guy at the counter stares right as in frustration as Mike changes his mind again; now our boy to forget the Koo-koo ball because he wants two Whoopee Bars, a Banana Zap and three bubble gums.

Panel 4: The cashier thought-bubbles "Here stand the decision makers of the future."

Summary: It's no wonder that Mike lets other people decide things for him; he sucks at it.

Tags: speculation theater

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