dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

Why everything will be Phil's fault....

As I said earlier, it's sort of obvious that the current debacle will be all Phil's fault. This is, of course, because his accusers don't have the honesty or courage to admit to their own failures as people. Let's list the charges that will be held against him and why they're not the case:

  1. "It's his fault that Connie pursued him in the first place." Since Elly is shallow, stupid and narrow-minded and only sees the surface of things, she can't see that her needy, immature, self-absorbed chum mistook a one-night stand as an invitation to pursue a deeper relationship.
  2. "Phil is leading Connie on.": Elly only vaguely seems to realize that Connie is fooling herself; since she can't see that Phil might be doing exactly nothing to encourage this, she assumes that Phil is sitting in his apartment thinking up new ways to trick Connie.
  3. "It's Phil's fault she went to the wrong address":  howtheduck tells us that Connie probably went to the wrong house in the new-ruin that appeared on 25 January 2010. If this is the case, it will be Phil's fault for not telling Elly the truth and not her fault for getting the address wrong.
  4. "It's Phil's fault that he has another girl": Phil has no idea that Connie expects him to spend his free time sitting by his phone and moaning "Why won't she call?" like the sort of doltish, jumped-up teenager she and Elly are. Since he has no idea that he and Connie are meant to be an item, his having a social life is a bad thing.
  5. "It's Phil's fault that she drove all that way for nothing.": This, of course, denies that Connie has free will and flies in the face of the truth; he had no idea that she was on her way or why. All he did was extend an open invitation to be nice.
  6. "Phil doesn't care about Connie because he's an evil man": This overarching assumption is dead wrong. One of the things he does when he moves to what will be called Milborough is to try to build a life with Connie because he feels bad about hurting her feelings. Sadly, she herself destroys any chance they might have had by trying to get him to play Popeye to Ted's Bluto.

The end result of all of this is that exactly nothing will be learned from this by people who need to learn it; Connie will not learn that the world rotates around her urges and Elly will not learn that her assumptions are, at best, faulty. Phil will learn something, though; he'll learn that he has to stop dating friends of Elly's to try to placate her.

Tags: connie: the real lynn, elly: lynn's fantasy self, phil: bee and bop king

  • Meet The Proxies.

    The irritating thing about having to remember the mess the Pattersons kept making of their love lives until they settled down with the safe person…

  • Meet The Rivals, Part One.

    Of course, Elly isn't the only person who finds Mira to be an existential threat because she's a reminder that there isn't much to Elly but talk and…

  • Turning the tap-dance into her crusade.

    The irritating thing about the Martha situation is that Elly handles it in much the same way as she handles her one-sided rivalry with Mira Sobinski.…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.