For instance, Elly didn't waste her life being pointlessly upset because she had the stupid idea that enjoying life was a sign that she wasn't worth taking seriously, she was a victim of circumstances. She also didn't totally misread her children's motives out of ignorance, spite, self-willed amnesia and self-pity, they really did want to chain her to the house; she also wasn't a negligent imbecile who ignored her children because paying attention was too much like work, she just wanted some alone time because she felt overwhelmed.
Similarly, John wasn't a smug, domineering clodhopper who insulted people because he likes being a malicious shit, they took his innocent whimsy the wrong way; he also wasn't a petty dictator who demanded obedience for a self-serving reason that betrayed his low expectations, he actually was fighting for his life against the unstoppable demonic force of average, placid kids who asked hatefully defiant questions like "Huh?" or "What's going on?" Finally, he isn't a dimwit who makes snap judgments based on prejudices he's too chickenshit to question, he's a sensible straight-shooter in a world of impractical people.
Speaking of the boring, passive offsprings both John and Elly agree were the aggressors, Mike was never a sullen dick who resented Liz because she was a weak girl instead of the playmate he wanted. Since he's too stupid to realize that he'd have fought with a kid brother, he'll spend the rest of his misbegotten life wielding whatever Liz did to react to his default hatefulness as a club to swat away any unfair ideas that hold him to blame for how their lives worked out lest they sully his consciousness with the hateful, unfair remorse and empathy hating haters who hate want him to feel. He also isn't a lazy, whiny, selfish bum making Deanna's life worse by the day with his entitlement and arrogance, Mira is trying to use her family politics to dictate to him.
Finally, Liz isn't a passive weakling who drifted through this life totally unaware of what was going on around her and trusting in fate to hand her free stuff; she's a take charge person who had to fight against the current for all the things she's earned. Also, she has no inclination towards seeing that Therese maybe had good reason to fear her presence; granted, the only reason she's absolved of blame is that she's too freaking stupid to realize how other people would see her but that's not something she should be proud of.
Aside from April's need to save face and Liz's being too dim to even know what she did, we're left with having to contemplate a mostly-bad family who have an exaggerated fear of the consequences of apologizing for their actions. This is probably owing to their being the creations of a woman whose parents probably never shut up about things she did wrong or who never let an apology be the end of a problem. There, as I've said, seems to be no other reason that the Pattersons fear that saying I'm sorry is forever.