dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

The narrow escape of the Continental.

As you will recall, the Strip of Destiny made a point of pointing out that April managed to make her escape from Milborough and having to marry the first white boy she'd met in pre-K. While we cheered because she'd thrown off the chains of fealty to the opportunistic, entitled vermin she calls parents, we also knew that April's ending was seen as something of a downer by Lynn herself. The idea of the child everyone treats like an inconvenience at best not being physically present to be treated like chattel and not married to some oafish clot whose chief virtue is that her lard-headed father can threaten him without fear of reprisal is seen as a source of incomprehensible heartache in the eyes of the Patterswine.

Not only will she be seen as repaying love, attention, tolerance and other things that John and Elly know if they seized up and bit them with a cold shoulder that they cannot explain, they'll probably cluck their stupid tongues and shake their empty heads about the horrors that poor, stupid Gerald had to undergo before he found a good woman instead of that awful child chasing her cardboard star of fame. That's right. I went there. I brought back souvenirs too. Any biography of Gerald would not only have us wallow in the fact that despite what misguided picky-faces living in insignificant little towns like Calgary might think, a smug nitwit who acts as if her opinion was optional at best is a better potential husband than someone who doesn't think that any sort of disagreement she might have with him is the result of girl hormones making her think wrong. We would also get to see more of Lynn's mindless and vicious hatred of professional musicians as we get to read about how Becky's quest for fame-not-friends led to her tragic death (which would probably be rejected as completely implausible by the story editor of '1000 Ways To Die'), Gerald's discovery of her cheating with the man who would end up shoving her into a rendering vat and the bargain-basement version of April he'll end up with as he takes up work teaching shop class or something.
Tags: becky, the continental, the liographies

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