dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,
dreadedcandiru2
dreadedcandiru2

Elly Patterson: Moron Guardian...

As you know, we're slightly more than a year away from a very interesting Halloween arc. This is because Elly throws a three-day long tantrum because Lizzie wants to go trick-or-treating as a punk rocker before hectoring Michael about the need to wear the costume she made him to keep him from getting into trouble with pride.

To explain why she does this, let's remember exactly how she ducked giving April the big, scary talk about scary, icky, unnatural sex. After whining to John about how awful it was that scary, scary information on the devil computers wasn't censored by the bums in Parliament, the chicken-hearted idiot hid a copy of "Our Bodies, Ourselves" in the bookcase as a means of tricking the child into learning. In both instances, Elly claimed to be wanting to preserve the children's innocence. The problem is that she reminds me of a sort of idiot I see on the news all the time; the imbecile I have in mind is a rock-stupid woman who lets her children run hog-wild because she's too damned dimwitted to keep track only to bleat piteously about saving them from harm whenever someone proposes to build something that'll do a number on her property value. Doesn't matter that the thing will create jobs, BitchDroid in the stretch pants whines about the children she blows off when the cameras go away and makes it difficult for me to keep my dinner down.

That's right. I went there and I brought back souvenirs. Elly is just another God-damned fraud who lives in fear of what the neighbors think. Doesn't matter if every last person on the planet tells her "It's Halloween, dummy!! Pull the broomstick outta yer ass!!", the crazy idjit is still convinced that she saved her family (pronounced "her-SELF") from being regarded as crazy anarchist(s) who worship Satan. What really makes Elly look stupid is that Jim and Iris eventually drag themselves up as geriatric members of the Kiss Army.
Tags: elly on her cross, elly versus the real world, holidazed pattersons
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  • 10 comments

  • Meet The Human Shield.

    The very distressing thing about the Great Big Sham Wedding is that as far as anyone knows, Liz has no God-damned idea that she took part in a sham…

  • The snowdrift and the milkbag.

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