dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,
dreadedcandiru2
dreadedcandiru2

Self-serving memory: it's not just for parenting any more.

Having to remember that Elly didn't seem to learn much from the Brad Luggsworth affair is a reminder that most of why she gave April questionable advice is that she felt that she handled Mike's problem excellently. As you will recall, I've written too damned many essays about how Elly simply cannot remember the past accurately. The reason that isn't her trying to avoid having to listen to that scary, evil and unfair voice that insists that she's mostly to blame for the chaos she wants to blame others for is that she wants to see herself as a better person than she actually is.

As one could expect, this need to think of herself as being more virtuous than she actually is extends to other parts of her life. Take, as by way of example, her constant whining about how ugly, old and undesirable she is. It's sort of laughable that she can tell Connie that aging didn't used to bother her when we know for a fact that she was obsessed with the idea that she was a decrepit old woman about to be packed off to the senior's home when she was just thirty or so. To say the least, it's ludicrous. To say the most, it's a flat-out lie. To say the truth, it's pretty much a certainty that each time Elly looks in her mirror and is depressed by the old woman she sees staring back at her, she honestly believes that this is the first time she's done so. More's the pity. Were she to own her own vanity, she might have the peace of mind she craves.
Tags: elly versus herself
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