dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

The artifacting of Thelma Baird.....

As I type this, I do so in the knowledge that it has been nineteen years since the oh-so-preventable death of Farley the dog. It has also been damned near seven years since Deanna added this horrifying little passage to her first post-Housnening retcon:

We've also got safety latches on the workshop and the garage, and we made very sure that the gate in the back fence is secure - we don't have a "Farley" around to rescue Robin or Merrie from the ravine.

What this means is that despite the obvious need to finally do the right thing and take child-proofing seriously, moron Elly continued to let something important slide out of what looked like sheer brainless laziness and the stupid belief that exposing her child to the lethal consequences of her parents' stupidity would teach her better than childproofing ever could. While those are good and valid reasons for Elly being a smug, inept bonehead, her brainlessness doesn't stop there. The reason I think that there's a third reason comes to us from one of those stupid podcasts Lynn has on her website. In it, she stated in all seriousness that Farley HAD to get loose and impregnate Sera because any new dog the Pattersons might end up owning must have a connection to Farley because if they just picked up a stray from Animal Control, their last connection to Thelma Baird would be gone. This is nuts because by the time April damned near got killed, Thelma Baird was long dead and all but forgotten by most of the readers and most of the cast. This tells me that one of the first things Elly commented on when she encountered a gate that prevented any old idiot from coming in and smashing up model trains or children from rushing out into traffic was how unwelcoming that looked. After all, did Deanna stop to think about how poor old Mrs Baird had arthritis and would have trouble letting herself in?

That's right. I went there and I brought stuff back. The real reason why Elly never saw fit to really latch the gate is that she's so stupid, she wanted to be a good host to a friend years after the woman's relatives made that final decision "casket or urn." The disturbing end result is that poor April got into all sorts of trouble she shouldn't have gotten into because of the sheer witless inertia of her brainless failure of a mother.
Tags: elly versus her family, elly versus reality

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.