dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

A tradition of stupidity.

As we all know, one of the reassuring things about watching most normal, healthy families is that positive traditions and family stories get handed down from one generation to the next to provide a sort of continuity to human affairs. It's kind of nice to be able to anticipate a future in which the past is honored. The problem with the Patterson family is that history teaches us that the only things that got passed on tend to add to the family legacy of being repulsive vermin people cross the street to avoid. As by way of example, let's look at the disgusting habit Mike has of putting dirty socks on doorknobs for Elly to have to pick up because, as a mother, picking up socks all day long is her job and hers alone. It so happens that John got the ball rolling because he wanted to 'help' Mike with the problem of being asked to behave as if he were a housewife or something. Since Elly isn't willing to let Mike's wife worry about reforming him, John has to help his son by showing him that if he wants things put away, he has to first 'remind' the little woman that it's her job to do so by showing her what she needs to do. The end result of that is to make of Michael a surly imbecile who hates to do stuff for people because he confuses chores with torture.

It turns out that this is not the only stupid tradition that's going to end up being the Patterson family legacy. As I've said before, we have to deal with the revolting habit they have of descending upon a dinner table to make noises like a gorilla eating a log cabin as they wolf down overly hot food down in a messy, smacky, gobbly, nasty manner as well as their habit of blaming other people for their own stupid negligence. We also have to remember that just as the only thing that John passed down to Mike was the stupid idea that a father is just a dollar sign that shouldn't be asked to interact with his kids unless it's fun, Elly passed on the idea that while children are parasites and husbands boors, avoiding both horrors means you're a failure as a woman. If anything positive or pro-social ever got passed down, it was by accident.
Tags: ogres are us

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