The example that comes readiest to mind is John making that hateful comment about problem hair when Liz felt as if she'd been shut out of junior high life because dumb-ass Elly's dumb-ass attempt to cheer her up about a bad haircut was to say that she had the exact same one at her age. What rock bloody stupid John thought was happening is that he was dealing with a coddled child who didn't know what pain was and needed the helpful guidance of an adult to see where she was going wrong. Why is it that John keeps forgetting that all war zone speeches do is make things worse by making the kid feel even shittier?
I should think that his major malfunction is that time has sort of edited away all of the worst parts of his own childhood so that he thinks that he was a lot nicer kid living in a far sunnier world. Most people who are as sick with nostalgia as he is seem to have come to the idiotic conclusion "I used to think that Patsy O'Connor dumping me for a guy who could play guitar was the end of the world but I know better now! This must mean that Liz ALSO knows better than to assume that problem hair will ruin her life forever and simply wants attention. I shall help her by calling her on her foolishness!" because he's kinda too stupid to realize that Liz hadn't at that point lived long enough to realize that a bad haircut plus three weeks is no problem at all. What he doesn't realize is that he's just made the problem worse by calling her a stupid person who's too petty to be fit company because of this whole inability to stop, say "CHEE!!! She hasn't been around long enough to know things will get better on their own" and actually be the effective father he thought he was.
Then again, it's easier for him to get all frustrated, bellow that the kids think they know everything and send them to Exile Farm to adjust their attitude than to think or to see things from their perspective because he's a raging asshole who actually does think he knows everything worth knowing. After all, Elly isn't the only narcissistic jackass in the family; she married her 'kind.'