dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

On the art of not going anywhere alone.

As we all know, the real reason that the Pattersons hate Mira isn't that she's a fearful bigot living in a messed-up world in which homosexuality is somehow on all fours with ax murder; the reason that they hate her is that, as April said, she gets to 'win' all the time. By this, of course, they mean that she manages to dominate the family politics by showing up at Mike's place pretty much at will so she can rant about his treating Deanna poorly and not listening to her advice and so on and so forth. Worse still, she wanted Mike and the kids to move closer to where she lived is that she could visit more often.

From her blinkered perspective, this seemed fair because as far as she knew, Elly visited them all the time because she lived an hour's drive from them and had a lot of free time. Since she saw Elly as being the one winning so hard, the scoreboard turned to diamond, it was only fair that she get her crack at being the center of attention for a change. What she never figured out is that Elly only ever visited the Death-Trap Of Delight one time in her entire life and regarded it as pretty much an extraordinary affair. Elly might salve her ego by stating that she's not the sort of person to be like horrible Mira and horn in when she's not wanted but that's as close to the truth as her calling herself loving, fair, firm and kind. What's going on her is that we're dealing with a mental peculiarity that seems to get worse as time goes on. At some point, any woman descended from Marian Richards develops her terror of the unfamiliar and turns into a sort of high functioning agoraphobe who thinks that going to a strange neighborhood is some sort of epic adventure in a far-away land where the fire hydrants are painted a different color. Since this is clearly too traumatic for someone as easily traumatized as she is, the idea is for people to come to her so that she might be spared the stress of witnessing the unimaginable horror of a different typeface on the street signs.

It still amazes me that she had the courage to go to University two time zones away from her birthplace. Well, not really. She wasn't raised to fear everything by an ass-scratching oaf father and over-grown ten year old 'mother' who wanted a submissive Kewpie doll to show off to the crowd. Liz tried to emulate her mother but it was doomed from the start because she couldn't conceive of a world where she had to meet anyone half-way. This means that Anthony was the only viable choice because he'd probably dissolve in a puddle if he came across a soup can with Chinese writing on it.
Tags: elly patterson: universal imbecile., freefloating commentary, lizardbreath: complete dunderhead

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