dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,

Potential story arc seven: Continental Adrift.

As we all know, there used to be something of a pattern in the strip. What would happen is that for some reason or another, a Patterson would be encouraged to marry the blondest of the pasty-faced white people they used to hang out with in first grade because of Lynn's belief that the fairer the hair and paler the skin, the more beautiful a person is. The not-very-well hidden context of April's segment of the strip of destiny is that for some reason that escapes Lynn, she turned her back on what was right (marrying Gerald) because she didn't know how much her family really loved her.

The problem with that which is not that we're dealing with a group of people who couldn't make their lack of patience with her clearer if they tried expecting her to trust them to look out for her best interests is that not only is the Continental a bigger waste of space than Pornstache was, he's awfully fond of Becky and her evil distracting star that makes her turn her back on friends and fun and no, John and Elly are not bitter idiots who are as jealous of Becky as April denies being despite bitterly envying her friendly enemy. Since a new creator wouldn't have the same hang-ups Lynn has, the future would probably not involve Becky being found violated and dead in a motel room because that's what happens to people who turn their backs on friends and fun.

What would happen is that we'd every so often get broad hints that fame-loving Gerald is bored with a Becky who shrugs off her 'misspent' youth. On the one hand, we have a fairly sympathetic young woman trying to make amends for the goofy antics of her high school years and on the other, an extremely pathetic young man who's staring down the barrel of ordinary life because he's too freaking stupid to realize what a one-hit wonder was. Once it sinks in that maybe Becks likes her life teaching kids to play the piano on the side while pursuing a more conventional life as some sort of office worker, Gerald's need to make high school last forever will force him to do something stupid to make his life right by begging April to take him back.

The problem with his clever plan is that by this point, it'll be after the Great Dysfunction. The end effect of the mass clearing of the air is to have a Liz, Anthony and Elly that regret the things that made Elly give John a high five and want very much to make sure that April avoids the same sort of mess. Also, they hate him like fire and like the new man in April's life and are thus going to spend a lot of time wondering what dead crazy person he's channeling giving up on a good thing like Becky.
Tags: for richer or for poorer

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