First off, we have to deal with the fact that Connie is less a friend and more an envious sycophant who envies everything Elly has while telling her everything she wants to hear. She laughs at Elly's jokes, she confirms Elly's inflated opinion of herself and she wishes that she could have everything Elly has.
Second, we have to remember that Elly's 'friends' threw her a baby shower because for some reason, it delighted them that while they would get to live an active, uncomplicated retirement, Elly is still dealing with a child's needs. Carol Enjo flat-out told her to her face that if someone's life had to be put on hold until it was all used up, everyone in the drainage area was glad it was the crazy woman screaming at the stupid dog.
Third, we have to remember that despite knowing that Elly simply wanted to keep her birthday to herself because she was anxious about a life that seemed to be in vain because it was lived for others, they presented her with a garish party she hated. They told her to her face that she wasn't going to get away with a private dinner with John because they needed to rub her nose in an anxiety.
The only possible conclusion to be drawn is that Elly doesn't have friends as you and I would understand the term. What she has is what Mike had growing up: a collection of jerks and oafs who hang around to watch her scream and moan because they feast upon her sorrow.