dreadedcandiru2 (dreadedcandiru2) wrote,
dreadedcandiru2
dreadedcandiru2

The brick hit house.

As we all know, the depressing idiot Michael still insists that Liz had all the mean-spirited crap he dished out coming because she was cuter than he was. Since he's too stupid to realize that his being a pain in the ass who never met a dare he wouldn't take, his hatred of sharing and his inability to want to admit that his mother is a person too is why no one likes him, he thinks that he's the victim of a plot to ruin him because admitting that he's a jackass who needs to have the sullen, stupid, counter-productive and quite inappropriate pride kicked out of him.

The reason that I mention this is that every so often, learning impaired Mike ran into Lizzie's fist when his being a malicious clodhopper who thought that she wasn't allowed to be happy because his band of scruffy vermin would tease him if he behaved like a human being instead of an inflamed boil. What always happened went something like this:

1) Mike says something stupid and demeaning when a decent human being would shut his yap.

2) Liz gut-punches him.

3) He thought-bubbles that 'weaker sex' doesn't apply to his sister.

4) He promptly forgets this because learning things is a humiliation he cannot survive.

5) Goto 1. Repeat forever.

Since he's got a baked potato where a brain's supposed to go, he's probably wondering why his kids don't get along; after all, he's doing right by Eatdirt and telling him that women are objects so what could be wrong?
Tags: mike patterson: universal idiot
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